Just a little more than two months ago, I didn’t have enough money to put gas in my car. I would go to buy groceries and hold my breath when I swiped my card. I was tracking how much I had, but every once in a while a late charge would kick in and send my account in the red. So I’d be at the grocery store with my son and my card would be declined.
Skip to today and I’m filling up my car with gas. I used to put in just enough to get me where I was going, but now I’m practicing filling it up with gratitude. As I’m pumping today and giving thanks for the fuel, I hear a voice behind me.
“Somebody is walking behind you,” says a male voice.
I turn around a thank him for warning me. Just 4 days ago, I was walking in a mid-size city at night and a guy came rushing up behind me. I quickly hopped from the sidewalk into a wide open and well-lit parking lot that was empty and had security cameras. I remember questioning what kind of male would do that. What’s up with these people that stand so close behind in line that you can feel their breath on your neck? I’m not sure if it’s a military thing or what, but I have a bubble or what we could a ‘kill zone’. I quickly get anxious once that bubble is invaded by a stranger. Another thing I’m working on.
So, back to the man. I thank him and he asks if he can ask me a question without seeming ‘creepy.’ After quickly assessing my surroundings, I give a ‘yes’ nod. He explains to me that he and his wife have moved from San Diego a few weeks ago and they bought a car in Hugo, Minnesota since someone told him to never buy a car in the city. The car is station wagon, which allows them to sleep in it when they aren’t able to get into a shelter. He says they are just looking for some food and it’s not about the money.
What would you do in the situation? No judgement, just what is your gut reaction?
When I’m in these experiences, I always go with my gut. No matter what their outside appearance is…I listen to my intuition. I explain to him that I don’t have cash, but that I can get some from the ATM. He apologizes again for walking up behind me. I tell him that I appreciate it as I’m a veteran and like to know my surroundings.
Well…turns out he’s a Navy veteran. I gave him and his wife $40. I told him I was also in transition and wish I could help more, but I gave him a card for Operation Synergy and told him I could help get him in touch with some local veteran service organizations. I don’t know if he’ll reach out to me or not, but I’ll help if he does.
I’m not sharing this to say what is right or wrong. I’m sharing it because letting go of that $40 was the greatest feeling. I trust that I will be abundant and that the Universe has my back AND MORE! I’m open and ready to receive. I’m also grateful that I had the chance to share a smile with this couple and share a few sentences about our military lives. Money is simply an exchange of energy. I don't have to worry how I'll replace that money, because I am provided for when I show up and serve.
I then came to a lunch meeting and two ladies were having a conversation about some new initiatives they are volunteering with for homeless and low income families in the area. One lady commented about how she wished the extremely wealthy could look down and see those who are struggling, but that they are too high up. I don't think it's that at all. There's no looking up or down. It's a matter of taking off our blinders and looking who is right next to us.
A year ago, I might have closed this man off because of fear. I might have felt the need to protect myself due to experiences I've had with abusive men in the past. That would just be giving my power away though. I might have assumed things about him. The truth is that we are one. We are love and so very loved. It doesn’t matter what I think about him or what anyone’s opinion is of me. I just get to be me and he gets to be him…all amazing and shiny as we are. We are one.